La Vita e Bella

Today Gondelstraat is having the welcome party for the new batch. I realized that it wasn’t fun at all, compared to what we had last year (see my post on September 12, 2005 - titled ‘Three Nights in a Row: Party’).

This year, instead of playing games, dancing, and get to know each other, the new batch are ‘welcomed’ by rules and regulations about how to keep the kitchen clean etc etc. Feel so sorry for those new people. My gosh - i agree with Kristian that they are adults… supposedly, they know what to do without the old batch (fiance’s) telling them what to do. I wonder if it is a human nature that we - unconciously - are feeling threatened when there are new people coming into our territory. And that’s why to make sure our territory is kept safe, then we make rules, we make regulations.

Oh well… 

I dont know. Ah i should stop these kinds of thoughts. I feel like lately, i easily feel unsatisfied about something. It’s like having an unidentified anger into an unidentified object. It’s like losing out the peace within you. The reason why i chose to join the yoga class yesterday at the ISS. It was provided by one organization for free, and there they didnt just teach us the movement but also some philosophy, which is very nice. It made me feel calm. Unfortunately it’s only at that short moment… Now im struggling again to find peace within me. Trying hard to have a conversation with my soul, trying hard to hear its voice which i have been neglecting because i’m so busy with the things that i have to do.

Maybe i should give it a try now. I’m going to pray.

Yeah, at least according to WHO’s category of young people, I’m still considered young!!! Hehehe…

But sadly I have to say that I’m starting to develop a trait that I characterized as typical adult: so busy with life and whoa… suddenly it’s my birthday again.

It’s just so different compared to my childhood.

I remember back then when I was small starting from late August I used to count how many days to go for my birthday, nervously guessing what presents will I get, wondering will they remember, what food will we share at the family dinner, etc. Oh I miss those kinds of feeling. It was lovely to have the feeling every once in a year.

And now I’m in my 24^th years already – so busy with my study that all I remember for September is September 25^th, the due date for my research paper draft. Hiks!

Good thing I have people around me that made my almost-forgotten-birthday becomes an unforgettable one. Of course, ‘around me’ here refers to both who are with me here virtually and those who are away but bothered to spend their time to write e-mails, FS testimonials, send e-cards, SMS, or call… oh my… I found this as one of the things that made my birthday so meaningful: to be remembered.

So as I was sitting in NS train that took me to

Arnhem

, I said a prayer thanking Him for that – for my family and friends.

Also for the person sits next to me who has made my days –especially that day- so wonderful.

For the fascinated journey I have here in the past year – dreams that come true.

For things that may come my way – because I know it’s all planned well in His hands.

For my life.

Yeah….

La vita e bella.

Today, 1 September 2006.

With some friends I went to Schiphol to pick up the 17 new batch from Indonesia.

It’s like revisiting the past…. exactly a year ago where I landed at Schiphol early in the morning with this much of luggages:

I remember my mom was concerned about my luggages, who’s going to help you to bring this much of thing when you arrived there? and i just said… oh dont worry mom, there’ll be people who will help me. And yes, i was right - i still remember that heavy blue bag, it was mas Yanto and mas TB the old batch who carry it for me.

This year, i kind of understand the way it feels… not as the one who’s expecting help like i did last year, but as someone who can offer a little help. To bother waking up in the morning at 4:30, bike like crazy to Central Station to catch the train to Schiphol, wait there in the meeting point, teach them to buy their first train ticket, use strippenkart, answering soooo many questions… Well, that was exactly the things that the old-batch did to us. Now i know how it feels… It’s tiring but fulfilling because yeah.. you feel like you’re doing good things to other people. It’s just simply nice.

I find it so beautiful how people can pass on good things to do to other people like this. It’s so different with what we used to have in Indonesia: when you go to an undergraduate study (or even in junior high and high school), normally in the begining of the study the old batch - or seniors, we call them- will ‘welcome’ us with passing on what they also get from their seniors. But no, dont expect that they’ll be nice to you - asking you what you need and helping you to adapt, no… instead of goodness what you get is hatred as the heritage from the seniors. And the year after, it’s normal for you to pass on this ‘heritage’ to another coming juniors. What a pity.

I’m so glad that it’s not that kind of negative thing that we’re passing on to them. What we share is the same kindness that we’ve got from the old batch last year. A little thing to do to help them enjoy the new journey that has begun, with a smile and not with worry, so with a big smile they can say: "oh, ini to ISS…." and proudly made a picture at the gate like we did last year hahaha….

Well, i’m so grateful that i have time to stop and look back like this. To see how much i’ve been blessed since the very first day i arrived here. And I hope this kind of kindness will continue being passed on… We can never pay back to the old batch for things they did to us - but we can always pay it forward.